When I was headed for Paris recently, for a business meeting, the one thing all of my friends kept asking me was: "What are you going to WEAR?"



It is interesting, and kind of amusing, that armouring oneself with the perfect outfit is something all women understand (I'm hoping they just all assumed I'd do my research, prep the vocab and come up with a decent question list...). And the truth is, I did arm myself with some options for outfits, including a shocking pink couture silk coat, a magenta satin 1960s dress suit, a 1960s silk and wool suit in blue and a magenta cotton vintage dress, none of which I wore.

Even my eventual choice of a 1960s lemon linen dress suit with hemstitching and a bow on the waist, I jettisoned at the last minute in favour of trousers, which for some reason make me feel more confident. I also didn't want to wear high heels, because of the heat (it was about 27 degrees in Paris) and I feel you can get away with low heels more easily with trousers. 



In the end, I wore grey flared chinos from Boden (my interview was conducted on a purgatorially uncomfortable Moroccan chair, only inches from the ground, so I was glad of the trousers which saved me waving my big fat knees at my interviewee), a plain white t-shirt and the jacket from the lemon linen suit, which has three-quarter sleeves and three big, covered buttons. It also has lovely hemstitching, which you can't see in these photos.  



I always wear a hat and took this raffia one (see top pic). Earrings were made by my jeweller friend Suzy, in silver fused with gold, and went with a pink pearl necklace; a cheap Hong Kong Cartier-tank-style watch from Ebay and some lemon leather vintage gloves with hemstitching, plus a screaming magenta pashmina tied to my bag handles.

I hate my hands, so I only ever wear a wedding ring (also made by Suzy), and I went for nail varnish for once, in iridescent pearl (as soon as I got home again, I clipped all my nails off, as I loathe long nails, which strike me as nasty and unhygienic).  



My handbag was a big mint-green mock-croc leather tote with neon stitching from Di Cristina (I love this thing - it's like a giant sweet and it holds all my junk), and I had a beige mock-ostrich laptop bag for my computer and papers. My notebook was magenta hand-made Italian buffalo leather with hand-marbled cream paper (a present from the DH from The Online Pen Company) and my pen was a cream and black marbled Parker Duofold fountain pen he bought me nearly 20 years and which I was shocked to find recently is now worth a small fortune (something to do with the rareness of the acrylic). I did also, of course, record the interview, with a small and discreet recorder that I set going well in advance, but it's always useful to be able to make notes as well.

Shoes, as I've mentioned before on this blog, are something that drive me a bit crazy generally, and I ended up wearing a pair of 12-year-old almond-toed courts in pale blue and gold brocade, with silver leather 2in Louis heels. I've worn these to several events such as weddings and parties, and I know I can stand all day in them if need be. 



Interview over, elsewhere in Paris and for travelling, I felt very comfy in my pale blue linen Jasper Conran sundress (v-neck, v-back, fully lined and an asymmetric skirt), and a pale grey cotton cardi from H&M, teamed with navy Fly-Flots, or Boden chinos in navy, worn with Nike low-tops on which I've coloured in all the pale bits with a black marker pen.

With temperatures up in the high 20s, I didn't need my Burberry polocoat, other than to lie on it in the Tuileries. It is ancient now, and there are holes appearing everywhere, so when I got back, I splashed the cash on a vintage trench from Aquascutum. 

The French are marvelously stylish and I envied their nonchalance, but, I looked every inch the Englishwoman in Paris. Which is fine by me - because, believe me, the French find the English every bit as chic as we find them. 

In Charla Krupp's book How Never to Look Fat Again, she details certain things that a girl should avoid if she doesn't want to look as big as a bus. Bright colours and skirts with volume are two of her 'Don'ts', so she'd have been well ashamed of me at the weekend.

The thing is, dressed in my screaming magenta cotton frock with big skirt (including - shock horror - pleats at the waist), I may indeed have looked two feet tall, but I got plenty of male attention. Lots of looks, lots of smiles, lots of heads turning (often looking quite sheepish when they saw I had the DH in tow). When it comes down to it, there is a great big fat difference between dressing to look thin and dressing to look sexually appealing.

I've been fat and I've been thin, so I know that men like women in all sizes and can cope perfectly well with a bit of cellulite - what they don't go for is wallflowers, hunched shoulders and women who dress like little brown mice.

The thing is, too, on Saturday I felt absolutely rubbish. I had an upset stomach and nausea, and a bloated tummy (those pleats were very welcome) and I would really rather have stayed at home. So teamed with the magenta dress went stiletto-heeled boots, a tight little black cardigan, a fitted pink tweed coat and a lilac ostrich-finish handbag. Also, a full face of slap, including blusher and bright lipstick to give me the colour that nature had so thoughtlessly removed.

And after a couple of hours of trolling round town and picking up admiring male glances, I felt a hell of a lot better. I am no spring chicken, and not by any means a skinny chick, but clearly I'm not quite dead yet, either.  

Having noticed that clothing company Wall are following me on Twitter, I paid a visit to their website, where I haven't been for a while.

Oh boy, it make me wish I had a pocket full of cash. Just look at these frocks. I would give my eye teeth for this green one. Along with the cracking colour, note the 40s-babe-friendly details on all these garments: a nice depth of neck to break up the bustline, a bodice design that allows you to wear a bra without it showing, a touch of Japanese asymmetry to the hemline, a waist seam that hits right at the narrowest part of the ribcage. 

Wall clothes are not cheap, but they are an investment because they are all about design, not fashion - they are clothes you can buy and wear for the rest of your life. Made from exquisite fabrics such as pima cotton, finely woven linen and vicuna, they eschew pattern in favour of texture and cut, gently skimming over the body.

Given my druthers, I'd buy a Wall piece every year, like a Shirin Guild or an Issey Miyake, and build up a wardrobe bit by bit. 

www.wall-london.com

Alright, alright, I know it's shallow, but here we go. The truth is, in an age where thinness is valued, many of us do want to look thinner in our clothes.

Anyone who's as skinny as she wants to be can stop reading here, but for everyone else (like me, after a winter of lard butties) here are some tips. 

* Aim for a long, lean, sleek line in everything you buy - don't buy clothes with volume. 

* Dress in one colour from top to toe, including tights and shoes. It's an age-old tip, but it really does work. If you tend to wear dark clothes and it seems too gloomy, make sure that your top half matches your bottom half (say, a jacket and skirt) but wear a contrasting blouse. Or wear dark brown, navy or charcoal instead of black. However, this trick also works in paler colours, including white.

* Matt dark fabrics with stretch are your best friend: think microfibre stretch tees, merino knit pencil skirts, suedette pull-on boots, poloneck sweaters. 

* Avoid texture, which adds bulk - mohair, boucle knits, guipure lace etc. If you like this sort of thing, save it for cushion covers and sofa throws, not your body.

* Stick to fluid, feminine fabrics such as wool or silk crepe, chiffon and knits. Avoid stiff, men's-type suiting fabrics or anything hard-edged such as patent leather or vinyl.

* 2-5 per cent stretch in any garment is usually a good idea.

* Don't wear your clothes too large. Jackets, coats and blouses should fit to the shoulder. Everything else should skim your figure, not envelope it.

* Don't wear shirts with a dropped shoulderline - these are men's garments, designed to make chests look broader (not something women generally want).

* Flip up your blouse collar at the back - it makes your neck look thinner. 

* Wear a long necklace or long thin scarf. If your necklaces have a tendency to drape themselves over one boob, try a heavy, flat pendant instead. 

* If your blouses gape, sew snappers inbetween the buttons for a better fit. 

* Wear your v-necks cut to the top of your bra or slightly higher. V-necks longer or higher than this, and crewnecks, tend to make your chest look vast. 

* Consider Henley necklines (round with a button-down front) or Moroccan necklines (round with a slit down the front), which bring emphasis back to your centre front. 

* Keep sleeves to elbow length or longer to hide bingo wings.

* Avoid short-sleeved garments - they're never the right length and it's usually more flattering to roll up the sleeves on a long-sleeved garment, which makes your forearm look daintier.

* Don't hide your ribcage area. This is the thinnest part of your torso, so it should always be visible. 

* Check that your bra is giving you enough uplift. Look for a 3-4 section cup, with or without an underwire, and thick straps that hoick your boobs up so your nipples are midway between your shoulder and elbow (or preferably higher). Lower than this, and your boobs will be hiding your ribcage, which will give a matronly look.

* If you have rolls of fat between bra band and waistband, wear high-rise knickers or an all-in-one control girdle. They're a lot more comfy than they used to be. 

* Make sure your clothes have vertical, not horizontal detailing. Vertical seams of the princess type are very slimming in jackets and blouses, giving a visual effect similar to boning.

* Diagonal shaping is also slimming - look for wrap tops, surplice tees, diagonal stripes etc. 

* Avoid bustline pockets and patch pockets on hips - these add bulk. Look instead for vertical pockets, or those that are inline with the side seam so they are invisible.

* Wear your jackets cut to the hip or high hip - NOT longer. A longer cut may comfort you with the idea that it covers your bum, but it also makes your legs look shorter. If you want to cover your backside, choose something with a more fluid structure than a jacket, such as a long tunic top. 

* Avoid dirndle skirts and pleated skirts that flare from the waist - they add bulk. If you like fullness in skirts, choose circle skirts, eight-gore flares or stitched-down pleats, which are flat at the waistline but flare out from about knee level. 

* Alter skirts so that they hit at the slimmest part of your knee - usually it's just above where it widens out into your calf. If you like narrow pencil skirts, have this done by a tailor because the side seams will also need taking in a bit. If you prefer longer skirts, have them about 4 inches above the ankle, in fluid fabrics, never at mid-calf length, which makes your legs look fatter.

* Do your utmost to find a good pair of jeans - then buy three of them. Look for dark indigo, bootcut, slight stretch, a proper v-shaped back yoke and the stitching on the side seams visible from the front to give a long line down your outside leg.

* For evening, think of fluid matt black trousers with black ribbon, braid or lace down the outer seam - this works on the same principle. 

* Look for shoes with a low vamp and no straps, to visually slim the foot. 

* Avoid ankle-strap shoes, and don't wear ankle boots with skirts. 

* Wear heels - if you look taller, you look thinner. If you're not comfy in heels, keep your flat shoes feminine and interesting but beware of ballerina pumps which can foreshorten the foot if the toes are very rounded.

* Consider knee-length boots instead of shoes, in the same colour as your skirt, for a long, unbroken line.

Damart can be horribly frumpy (they were once best known for thermal underwear, after all), especially in summer, when the majority of clothing available anywhere seems to turn to a dreadful hideousness, but as usual there are one or two gems there. 

Bypassing the vile leggings and cropped trousers, these jeans struck me as useful. You can choose from this pull-on type at top left (flat-fronted, but with handy belt loops, should you wish to hide your dreadful elastic secret), or a tummy-support design - IMHO, something every woman over 40 should have in her wardrobe. The former are only £16, while the latter are £35 and the nice thing about ordering from a catalogue is that no-one's watching when you try them on. 

This blouse (right) also has some very nice details - note all the vertical seams, the flattering neckline, the three-quarter sleeves that allow you to show off a bit of arm candy. It comes in ivory and a sort of grape colour on the UK site, but this taupe shade is only available on the .fr site.

This camisole (left) is also a good design - again with vertical detailing, wide straps you can get a bra under and enough length to be useful - while the piped navy cardi below is the sort of thing that would smarten up jeans or team with a white skirt or navy trousers for summer. It is a little formal for me, so even better is a navy and white striped one they have on the site.

Dressing smartly in summer is always a problem for mid-life women - especially for work. The office might be either air-conditioned or a sweatbox, while travelling can be a nightmare on public transport - at least in a car you can set your own temperature, but on a bus or a train, you never know what you're going to get. Meanwhile, if your look or your lifestyle doesn't suit strappy, clingy little bits of nothing and you do at least need to look respectable, the manufacturers aren't interested in you. 

Summer colours are often rubbish too. Pastels are often horrible shades of turquoise, peach and pink in cotton jersey or poly mixes that look cheap and nasty, and there are lots of overblown florals. Personally, when it comes to pattern, I favour stripes and polka dots for summer as they always look fresh.

With regard to colour, you can't go wrong with combis of a good neutral such as black, navy, khaki or taupe, mixed with white or cream, or self-patterned and tonal mixtures. The latter often work best in in medium-toned colours such as denim blue or taupe, as these go with virtually all other colours.

This classic shift dress shown right (what the Americans would call a 'jumper') is again available on the French site but I didn't see it on the UK one. Made of chambray, it could be worn almost anywhere from the city to the waterfront. I can see my friend C wearing this.

From the French site (not available in the UK) comes this crinkle cotton outfit (left), in khaki or blue. This is the kind of outfit beloved of French women in mid life: a bit of pattern, vertical detailing, no ironing required, a bit of flirt in the ruffles, and quite a lot of flexibility. You can team the dress with a cardi, shrug or the matching blouse, or go sleeveless, and the fabric can take an absolute hammering without showing a mark. I see a lot of women wandering round my supermarket in various dress-and-blouse or skirt-and-jacket combos like these. 

Sad that the UK site isn't offering these excellent clothes, given that it’s the same company, but there are some other nice dresses to choose from, including an A-line, button-down, princess-seamed dress in chambray. This is one of the most flattering dress shapes on most women, is cool for summer with that lack of a waist seam and can take a lot of dressing up or down with cardis, belts and bags. For my casual lifestyle, it would be a winner.

More on Damart later.